:): January 2009

Saturday, January 31, 2009

Special report

Haha this is special report - my heart condition. If you (anyone who follows this blog) realise, I don't like to talk about my condition too much. Cos somehow I think I prefer to keep a happy blog. Therefore I only blog happy stuff. And when there are unhappy things that happen I will only blog when it's done and over... or when I'm finally feeling better. But today I feel like blogging about my heart condition... since a few people have been asking me about it recently cos I no longer talk about it.

I am fine ya. After the surgery last April I felt alot better. Even though the condition is still there, April-Nov2008 was the period of time where my condition was most stable in this past 7+ years. Can't deny it feels like it's deteriorating recently... since mid December...

I am actually feeling quite scared to have palpitations now... like yesterday and today... for some reasons. My last appointment at SGH was on 16dec last year.. a month ago. Doctor told me that he has no choice and he's left with a last method that he can try to help me. But this last method is very dangerous. The catheter will not be poked through my inguen anymore.. it would have to be poked directly from the diaphragm area. And if poke from there it means a higher risk of poking the heart and causing heart perfusion. When that happens, I will have to be prepared for open-heart surgery immediately. And then comes more risk cos' it's open-heart. That is why I am now even more afraid of palpitations than before, cos those are signs of... a 4th surgery... which is this new method of poking me and I don't want that day to come so soon. Even though it's quite impossible, I'm also hoping for a miracle - a miracle I've been hoping for for 7 years - that it'll just heal by itself without intervention.

That's just a hope. I don't expect it to come true. I don't even expect that any new creative method of surgery would cure me. Somehow, over the years, I've learned to live and cope with it. It doesn't bother me alot anymore even though there are still times of discomfort. I think it even taught me many of life's valuable lessons.

I've been following Shin's blog - the lady with advanced stage cancer. Her link is on my previous entry. She just passed away. A week ago she was still blogging. According to what her husband posted recently on her blog, she has written in her will that she's willing to donate her healthy organs and her whole body for research purposes. I would like to do that too when I die. And hopefully future medical professionals can find a better way to remove my stubborn set of extra pacemaker cells. :P

Today is a rather bad day I can say... Went for post-trip sharing at Jamiyah Children's Home with my YEP team. It's been so long since I last felt such lasting palpitations. For the whole afternoon I was having faster than usual heartbeat. But maybe yesterday was worse cos' we had Biodiversity practical - which was a field study. Our TAs brought us to Kent Ridge (just next to NUS) for a walk and we learned about the different types of trees shrubs ferns and creepy crawlies. Kent Ridge...is a ridge... so yes, we had to climb this long steep flight of steps to reach the top where the field studies were carried out. Then for the rest of the session while we were all walking up and down slopes I kept feeling uncomfortable because the way up there already gave me a hard time.

For now I'll just try to keep myself happy -cos' emotions play a very big role for any kind of illness. So to anyone reading this who's also got some health problems, do keep your spirits high. :D I have this cute little quote to share - a quote I read in a Chicken Soup series that Meimei recommended to me:

Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn't be able to fly, for its body is way too big for its miniature wings. But the bumble bee doesn't know that so it goes on flying anyway. -Mary Kay Ash

Team A in Myanmar

19.12.2008 - 02.01.2009

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Shin -an amazing lady

http://shinscancerblog.blogspot.com

Please click on the link above. In face of death she continues to live her life triumphantly.

Below is a poem I read in "Chicken Soup for the Unsinkable Soul"... and I wish to dedicate this to her. (:

Ode to the Champions

Who are these people -
These doers of deeds,
These dreamers of dreams
Who make us believe?

Who are these people
Who still win the day -
When the odds are against them
And strength fades away?

These people are champions,
For they never give in.
A heart beats within them
That is destined to win.

They follow their dreams
Though the journey seems far,
From the top of a mountain
They reach out to a star.

And when they have touched it -
When their journey is done -
They give to us hope
From the victories they won.

So here's to the champions -
To all their great deeds.
They follow their hearts
And become winners indeed.

-Tom Krause

2hours' shopping

Background information: Wuzhen is a girl who doesn't like to shop. Her patience for shopping can only last 45 minutes the longest (proven by Peiwen Jianeng and Yuting who went shopping with her for graduation night 2 years ago).

But today I went shopping alone and it lasted more than 2 hours! :D So I shall share abit about my shopping experience.

A week ago, I went to Popular at Hougang Mall to buy ink cartridge for the intensive lecture notes printing this new semester... and I bought a few cartridges to last me for at least a few months. So it summed up to about $50. Then coincidentally, at the customer service counter I saw a long queue... and a big crowd surrounding the "fortune wheel" behind it. Curious, I went forward to take a look. The signage says: "Spend more than $50 and stand a chance to win a $50 Asia Malls voucher! Each person only entitled to one opportunity to try their luck at the fortune wheel." SO, being auntie, I decided to try it...no harm anyway. All the aunties there were saying "Aiya wont get it one la, I stand here so long haven't seen any lucky winner." haha and then TADA there's a lucky winner that day - me! My mum asked me to use that $50 voucher to buy a set of new year clothes for myself. So I did... yay I have new year clothes this year! All thanks to Asia Malls corporation XD

Today morning, I went to a tuition centre at Jurong East... for a job interview as a JC H2 Biology tutor. The principal of that tuition centre is a GP teacher himself and once taught GP in some JC. He's a really nice guy, a large proportion of his tutors are actually undergraduates. Even though there's probation period and trial lessons, I'm still quite impressed by the amount of faith he has in us university students. So I must not disappoint him! And yea I recommended Yongkang (from Myanmar YEP Team B) to him for H2 Math and Yongkang accepted his offer :D. Hope we'll be happy working together in the near future. And oh no... lesson planning.... ><

After that I went to Hougang Mall by train. And even though I've bought myself something for new year, I want my parents to have new clothes to wear this year too. So I used a small part of the $1200 bursary award I just received to buy a blue checkered collar shirt for my papa and a red blouse for my mummy.

From as young as I start to form pictures in my mind, I've always seen my papa like that...

My papa in the blue checkered shirt I bought for him :D... (I made him pose for the shot and he really did! XD)

Even though I'm not looking forward to turning 20, I'm really very happy today and I'm starting to look forward to CNY, cos' we'll all be wearing new clothes this time. :D

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Girls @ Minds cafe

I'm back from Myanmar! Back from being lost in time and space, back from the place where I spent 15 days without reception, away from the world, closest to only nature, and where I found a wonderful group of friends whom I sincerely wish to keep for a lifetime - my beloved TEAM A. (: And for those who know about it*... yes, i've recovered, totally... after this trip. (:

Ok, shall blog about Myanmar another time... too much to say. Shall blog about yesterday first. Went out to Minds Cafe @ boat quay with the girls, my sec 4 clique of friends. Coincidentally, it was ladies' night! So we played for freee XD. Sometimes I find this friendship with my 4e2 classmates (especially our group of girls) amazing. Close to 6 years of friendship... it really did transcend time and distance. Yiling will be flying off on 5 feb to Australia for her opthoptics studies under singhealth scholarship. Think we're all going to miss her.